Tissues For Trump

By D. Allan Kerr

I was scrolling online last night and came across a tragic tale of how TV host Anderson Cooper treats GOP nominee Donald Trump unfairly. My eyes teared up at the injustices poor Donald must endure.

Here’s a guy who came into this world with nothing but his name and a few million dollars. Here’s a guy – aw, who am I kidding. This pampered little brat is the biggest crybaby to ever run for the White House. Ever.

He chickened out of a primary debate because moderator Megyn Kelly was too tough. He’s reluctant to attend a debate hosted by that scary meanie Anderson Cooper. He complains that upcoming moderator Lester Holt is a Democrat, which is just the latest in his Encyclopedia Idiotica of Lies – Holt is actually a registered Republican.

Poor Donald has whined of unfair treatment by MSNBC, Fox News and CNN, by “Morning Joe” and Bill O’Reilly, by the Washington Post and the Weekly Standard, and by the third-grade girl in pigtails who used to take away his lunch money.

And this is the guy who claims he’s tough enough to take on terrorists? This Artful Draft Dodger whose coquettish swooning over Vladimir Putin makes Neville Chamberlain of 1938 sound like Winston Churchill?

This morning I ran over to the nearest store and bought a box of tissues for Donald.


I suppose I could have sent some cheese to go with his whines, but tissues are cheaper and easier to ship.

I’m sending to the following address listed on the website of our Whiner-in-Chief:

Donald J. Trump President Inc.
C/O Trump Tower
725 Fifth Avenue
New York, NY 10022

Sounds like he’s going to need them during the next debate, and beyond. Poor Donald.



(September 21, 2016)

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